Spare Change

Fall Reality TV Recap Summary

Posted by Bryan

Spoilers to follow...

• Survivor. The right person won. Judd's a liar, Steph carried more posterior stilletos than a ginsu ninja, Rafe won't ever try to get comfortable again, and Lydia was Cheri Oteri in a cameo skit, you just didn't realize it. We award Guatamala Survivors the Emmy right now.
• The Amazing Race. Family Edition, you are the New Coke of Reality TV. Drive to a gas station, find your next clue. Drive to this farm 300 miles away, get your next clue. Drive to this abandoned crack house, find your next clue. Linz Family, you win. Weavers, thanks for showing the world the pimple-riddled face of carnal Christianity. Let's agree this season was a big, big mistake, and try again in February with the original formula.
• The Apprentice, Donald.
  Donald: Randall, you're hired.
  Randall: I'm inspired!
  Donald: Rebecca, you're hired?
  Randall: That's conspired!
  Rebecca: Is this required?
  Donald: This isn't desired.
  Randall: She's not admired.
  Donald: Rebecca, you're fired.
• The Apprentice, Martha.
  Martha: I'm uninspired.
  Alexis: I'm tired.
  Cigar dude: Has this expired?
  Alexis: What has transpired?
  Martha: I just don't fit in here.
• The Biggest Loser. A new study has shown that America's obesity epidemic can be solved by a brassy pair of fitness experts, a conspiratorial team of fellow selfish-minded tubbies, and the gritty encouragement of a down-to-earth comedienne who "keeps it real" by herself being ambiguously out of shape. Oh, and several months paid leave of absence from work and total isolation from friends and family, with the enticement of a quarter million dollar reward.

Bring on the Spring with Panamanian Survivor and the Exile Island, the Real Race returns, and of course, American Karaoke.